A Mother’s Journey with Tongue Ties

A Mother’s Journey with Tongue Ties

If you’ve followed my blog for long, you’ll know that tongue & lip ties and nursing challenges are a passion of mine, especially after having experienced challenges with all of these factors with several of my own children. I’ve also been in contact with many moms who are struggling with nursing issues or fussy babies, and so many times there is a connection to either a tongue or lip tie (or both!). Recently, a mom shared her story in a Facebook Group for Moms that I’m part of. Her story touches on so many of the factors that I have seen and/or experienced, that I contacted her and asked for her permission to share her post with you all. I am so grateful, as Tanisha covers many factors to consider in her story, and I think it will be beneficial for many moms who might be struggling. If you are struggling with nursing issues, I really want to encourage you that you aren’t alone, and that there are answers out there!! And if you resonate with this story, I would love to hear about your experiences! It can help other moms when they can hear first-hand what worked for others in similar situations.

~Kelsey

Now on to our guest post, written earlier this year by Tanisha Gingerich:

**Shared by the author’s permission**

I thought I’d make a post for whoever it might concern, about our journey so far with tongue and lip ties. They are becoming increasingly common it seems, and I thought sharing my experience might be a good way to bring awareness so that any other moms going thru something similar can benefit from (or add to) what I’ve been learning.

A week post partum, I was scabbed from nursing, and in a lot of pain every time I fed Micoma. She was gaining well, so we probably could have made it work (a lactation consultant can help you and baby work past a multitude of feeding problems), but I knew from experience that although I could “make it work,” my milk supply was going to tank around 4-6 months. Ties can also cause speech, dental, and sleep issues down the road, along with a host of other problems.

So in the interest of short-term pain for the long-term good, I took Micoma in at a week old for a consultation and ended up getting her lip and tongue ties lasered right away so we could begin the healing and retraining process as soon as possible before bad nursing habits were formed.

I cried and prayed over her before they did the 3 minute procedure, and sobbed compulsively while they swaddled her and used a laser to cut the ties open. The woman doing the procedure was a mom too, and was so compassionate and kind with Micoma. Then they left us alone in a cozy room to nurse, and I heaved more sobs as I comforted my baby. Being able to hold and nurse her was probably just as healing for me as it was for her.

Her latch was instantly better. Over the next few days I had to continually remind myself of the long term good, as I did stretches on her wounds. To my relief, the stretches were done in under 30 seconds, and Micoma always recovered quickly… I soon realized she was screaming louder over getting her diaper changed than she was over the oral invasion, so that made me feel better. I told her all the time how brave she was, and gave her every comfort to guide her through the rough patch.

That first week dragged on for me. I hated having to keep stretches in my mind every 4-6 hours even thru the night—got kind of sick with dread thinking about it. I kept Micoma on Tylenol the first 2 days, and again on day 4 when there was a flare up of discomfort. Other than that though, she continued to eat and sleep very normally (not everyone has it so easy, some babies will hardly eat for a day or two, and cry all the time. Thankfully Micoma nursed for comfort, and seemed to tolerate gracefully any discomfort she was feeling). At one week we had a follow up appointment and they said everything was healing well and there was no reattachment. I was so relieved.

By the second week all was routine, and the scars were nearly healed up. Sometimes she wouldn’t even wake up when I did the stretches so I knew they weren’t painful. Currently we have just passed the 3 week mark, which means I can de-escalate the stretches rapidly and they will disappear in a few days. Hooray! One hurdle over. Now on to the next. I had a lactation consultant come at week 3, to help me teach Micoma new nursing/sucking habits. I learned so much!

First of all, babies begin practicing how to suck from week 12 in utero. This is how they build the oral strength they need for nursing. Unfortunately, when a part of their tongue is tied down, they are unable to fully lift and tone those muscles.  When they are born and begin nursing, the restrictions to their lip and or/tongue, make it hard or impossible for them to latch correctly or suck efficiently. As a result, nursing is laborious for them. You may hear a “clicking” noise or notice milk dribbling out the sides of their mouth, these are telltale signs. They frequently fall asleep while nursing, just from the strain it, and are unable to properly empty the breast. This can obviously cause low-weight issues, milk supply issues, and severe frustration to the baby. The baby will often resort to chomping or some other measure in an attempt to get milk, resulting it a lot of discomfort or pain for the mom.

But even after ties are released, there is still some work to do. Baby’s latch will probably be better right away, but you’ll need to help hertone her oral muscles and relearn how to suck correctly with the new range of motion in her mouth. I was given a series of simple tongue exercises to do with Micoma every day… they are more like games, and activate her reflexes to get her tongue moving, especially in the places she’s not used to lifting it.

Now, to back up a bit, there are two kinds of ties—lip ties and tongue ties. I’ve also heard of buchal ties (cheeks) but know very little about them at this point. A lip tie is easiest to spot (example of one in comments) and if a lip tie is present, a tongue tie is almost always present too—they tend to go hand in hand. Keep in mind that some care providers are not trained to look for *posterior* tongue ties (these are in the back of the mouth and not as obvious as anterior ones), so those often get missed. Ties vary in severity (where they are attached and how drastically they are affecting function of the lip/tongue. Sometimes it may be negligible).

Next thing I learned, tongue tied babies are notoriously “tight.” The tongue sits at the very top of the spine, and if there are restrictions in the tongue, you will see restrictions all the way down through the body. Sure enough, Micoma is very tight in her shoulder/neck area, has over compensated for it in her lower back, and has tight hips. Once again, I was given a series of simple rhythmic motions and stretches to loosen those areas up and bring everything into alignment. She has a bit of a “C” shape curve when she lies down, that’s another common sign of tongue-tie related tightness. (Pic in comments) I wish I would have known this with my oldest daughter Verona. She was incredibly C-shaped, and these stretches would have loosened up her uncomfortably tight muscles.

Looking back, both of my children before Micoma had ties of some kind. I always had to use a nipple shield with Verona, and I remember Benny getting so angry when I nursed him. My supply going down around 4 months was another telltale sign. Both children despised tummy time, which was most likely because of how tight they were in their neck and lower back. I suspect “ties” is some of why they slept so poorly and aggravated colic symptoms early on… In-efficient nursing brings more air into the stomach and causes gas discomfort/excessive spitting up. And in a very strange twist of fate, if the tongue cannot reach up to the top of the pallet and rest there while sleeping, the top of the mouth becomes domed, crowding teeth and restricting airway. This can lead to mouth breathing, sleep apnea, and dental issues.

Verona’s lip tie comes all the way down between her teeth, which is why she has a gap between her front teeth. Neither of the children seem to be having difficulty eating, speaking, or maintaining good dental hygiene and structure other than that. So I’ll just keep an eye on them, and only resort to doing anything about theirs at this point if I see it’s going to cause them major problems down the road. But I do grieve the suffering we all went thru with months of screaming colicky baby, and the eventual loss of breastfeeding bond. That pain far surpasses whatever me and Micoma went through the last month in laser-correction and recovery.

So for that reason, I would support moms in pursuing tie-releases if you feel it would be beneficial for your baby. As with everything child-related, there is controversy surrounding the issue—whether ties are really a thing, whether they’re a big deal, clipping or lasering, stretches or no stretches. In my case, I saw enough consequences in my last 2 children that I was willing to believe ties affect quality of life enough to warrant a minor surgery. Lasering has a lower rate of re-attachment and requires no stitches, so I went that route. And the stretches I did because Micoma tolerated them well and I was determined not to let the fibers re-attach while they were healing… and I grilled my caretaker about whether it was necessary, and she says she does see a fairly high rate of reattachment if stretches are not done. Albeit, I did the bare minimum I thought I could be get by with, and with good results. That was my story, you get to write your own. Decide what’s best for your child, whether that’s therapy to work past a tie, or a surgery to correct it, or whatever and don’t let people throw a lot of shame or fear onto you for it.

Currently I am pumping a few times a day and using an SNS (supplemental nursing system) several times a day to stimulate my supply and simultaneously get Micoma the extra food she sometimes can’t get herself. I’ll keep working with Micoma’s body and tongue to get everything loosened up and toned… hopefully within a month we’ll be at a place where she can keep my supply up on her own. In the mean time we’re not goning to go many places this month, just stay home and focus on the task at hand.

Many people take their children to chiropractors pre and/or post tie release for body work. It helps with nursing if your baby is aligned properly. For the time being, since I have bodywork I can do at home with her, I am skipping that… see if I can get by without it. Cranial Sacral therapy is another thing highly recommended… I don’t know, it could possibly be a legitimate thing with babies since their skulls are still un-fused and somewhat mobile, but I have heard of enough occultist ties connected to this practice done in adults that I plan to avoid it all together.

This post was not meant to diagnose or treat any illness. It’s my personal story and some things I learned along the way, left here for people to sift thru and take whatever is for them.

If, btw, you decide lasering is the right option for you (and you are local to central PA), I had a good experience with Dr. Katherman in York. Her office felt like such a warm and caring place to me, and she was on call at all hours if I had questions later. Also, do yourself a favor and hire a lactation consultant. You won’t regret it! Do a bit of research first and find one that people you know have had good experiences with (there are a few bad eggs out there). Again, I had a wonderful experience with the one I found, and I’ll link her website for reference.

Dr Katherman: https://www.cdepa.com

Jessica, Lactation Consultant: https://bornandfed.com

The cost to get two ties lasered was $750. I am going to turn it into my insurance sharing plan, but I do not know yet if they will cover it. The lactation consultant fee for an hour and a half session was $175. So it is a good chunk of change. But when compared to the potential costs of not doing it, it is a very reasonable investment.

I hope that’s everything. My mind is still kind of whirling from all the things I’m learning, so this was my way of processing it. Hoping it will be helpful to someone else.

P.S. Out of curiosity, I asked both the doctor and lactation consultant if ties have become more common recently or if they’re just being diagnosed more, so we’re more aware of them. They both said ties are becoming increasingly common. I don’t think even my mom’s generation would have seen very many, so this seems to be a rapidly developing problem. Presumably, Western diet and lifestyle as well as the declining quality of foods (grown from nutrient-depleted soils) plays a role. There seems to be evidence to support that lack of folate and other B vitamins in the early stages of embryonic development contributes to ties forming—or the presence of the synthetic B vitamin folic acid commonly in prenatals and fortified foods. And others say there are indications that genetic mutations (the MTHFR gene) play a role. But no definitive studies have been done, that I know of. Everything is speculation at this point. Someone gave me two articles so I’m linking them below. My midwife gave me some resources to dig into and I’m hoping to do more research to see if this plague is avoidable.

Connection to MTHFR gene: https://www.checkupnewsroom.com/a-pediatricians-goes-in…/

Connection to regular folic acid intake: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31835174/

I maintain a decently healthy diet and take quality supplements including methylated B vitamins so it’s hard to believe that was the cause of all 3 children having ties. Except that I was under exponential stress the past few years, and as I understand it B vitamins are created in the gut… if you have bad gut health or are under stress, B vitamins do not form well. So that could be a factor. Like I said, I’m going to keep digging and see what answers I can find.

End of Year Update for 2020!

End of Year Update for 2020!

Some highlights of the year!

Dear friends and clients of Gentle Delivery,                                                

      As 2020 comes to a close, I am reminded of the fact that we really do not know what the next day or year will hold. Last year at this time our family was anticipating the arrival of our fifth child, little knowing how many strange twists and turns the New Year would bring to everyone all over the world. I am grateful to rest in the confidence that nothing takes God by surprise, and that He cares about the details of our lives, which provides strength & courage to press ahead into the future!

       After adding baby Tirzah to our family last December, I enjoyed a lengthy maternity leave, and felt so blessed and cared for during those first postpartum weeks. Thanks to many of you for your part in this! It’s true that you learn some things by experience that you couldn’t learn through academic study, and I am more committed than ever to encouraging moms to get adequate rest, adjust expectations, and take the time to really recuperate during those first postpartum weeks. It really is worth it! This baby has been our most contented, too, and while there are many things that probably play into this, one key factor that seemed to make a difference was the addition of infant probiotics into her daily routine from the very beginning. If you have struggled with fussiness in your baby, please take a minute to check out the blog post I wrote where I detailed this information—I really want to see more families benefit from my own challenging experiences!

            As you can imagine, the COVID pandemic has affected midwifery in more ways than one. After the initial quarantine I have been doing prenatal and postpartum care visits for local clients in their homes, as it reduces the exposure for those coming in and out of my home office. I’ve also had more inquiries into homebirth this year than ever before, as many families are concerned about hospital restrictions and germ exposure. Between this added level of interest in midwifery care and my added family responsibilities, I have needed to limit the distance I can travel for births, which has meant turning down requests in outlying areas even for a few clients I’ve worked with before.  

            One fun aspect of care this year has been the large amount of repeat clients I’ve been privileged to serve! It was really special to catch my first “fourth baby” for a family, and have the opportunity to see babies that I have caught in years past welcoming baby siblings. With one more 2020 baby left to go, the current stats for the biggest baby this year was 8#14oz, and the smallest was 5#14oz. The earliest baby came around 2 weeks early, and the latest was almost 2 weeks late, which goes to show that there is much variation in the range of “normal”. Assisting my back-up midwife with the home delivery of twins was another extra-special experience this year! Speaking of my back-up midwife, I am grateful to have the assistance of RoseMarie Spicher to care for clients when I am unavailable, and I’ve been glad to have a working relationship with a community of midwives in the general area who have all needed to pull together to cover for each other at times due to COVID exposure or for other reasons. I’m also excited to be working regularly again with Lynelle, as she plans to attend births as my assistant this next year after taking some time off to welcome her own baby this past summer.       

            Heading into 2021, I’m anticipating meeting many sweet babies, and I’m enjoying making new connections with many families who are choosing midwifery care and homebirth options for the first time. I continue to feel a sense of gratefulness towards each of you for giving me the privilege of working with your family as you journey through this intimate season of life. It truly is a gift to witness the miracle of birth and the wonder of that first cry, and the wonder of that moment never grows old!

            As I close, I also want to thank my family for their support as I do this work, and in particular thank my husband as he quickly and competently cares for our home and children during my random absences. It takes a special family to deal with the unpredictable aspects of having a midwife for a wife and mother, and I’m grateful for all they do behind the scenes to make this option available to the families I serve. It’s a joint effort, and I could not do what I do without Joel’s encouragement and work behind the scenes.

            May God bless you and your family throughout this next year!

           ~Kelsey Martin/Gentle Delivery Midwifery

Be sure to regularly check out this blog and the facebook page to stay updated on current news, helpful information, health suggestions, birth stories, and announcement of special events. I’m really hoping that playdates can resume again sometime in 2021!

Tips for Boosting Your Milk Supply: Recipes & Supplements

Tips for Boosting Your Milk Supply: Recipes & Supplements

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As I write this, I’m sitting here nursing my fifth child who will be 7 weeks old tomorrow. My experience with nursing and milk supply has been different with each child, as you may know if you’ve read this blog over the years. All of my babies have had issues with tongue and lip-ties, some of which were quickly resolved, and others where that wasn’t the case. One nursed well and gained quickly, another nursed okay, but I had to be very careful as my supply would tank quickly if I was extra busy or exercised much. Both of my boys struggled for months, with both of them needing to be supplemented and then fully bottle-fed by around 4-6 months (you can read about their stories and some of the things I learned and experienced here and here). With both of them, the challenges of poor nursing/latch also resulted in really low supply on my part. Those days were so long & discouraging. If you’re in the position of facing lots of challenges with feeding your baby, I totally get you!

So in preparing for baby #5, I had no idea what to expect. I did know I wanted to be prepared for lots of challenges just in case. We were also planning to do a significant amount of traveling when baby was still very young, and I wanted to make sure to have things on hand to boost my supply if it was needed, as I’ve learned from experience that it is MUCH easier to encourage a robust milk supply if you don’t let it drop too far to begin with! Before baby Tirzah was born, I spent some time researching additional options to add to my list of things to help boost supply.

IMG_3347 (2)This experience has been different yet! The first few weeks found baby gaining really slowly (she lost a pound after birth, and took three weeks to regain it!), which of course had me worried after everything that happened with my previous baby. But around 3 weeks old, things began to shift, and her suck got stronger and she began to gain weight! By now, at 7 weeks, she is a healthy, chunky 11 pounds, which means she has put on 2 pounds in just over 2 weeks! I thought perhaps there might be some other moms out there looking for ways to increase and improve their milk supply, so I’m going to share some of my favorite suggestions…some of these I found helpful when I was exclusively pumping for baby #4, and they have gone on to be helpful this time around.

If you are needing to establish or boost supply, your first step is to nurse frequently!! Lots of skin-to-skin time, especially in those first weeks, really helps to establish that supply, as well as nursing whenever baby is interested and for however long (and make sure the don’t go longer than 3 hours during the night those first few weeks!). Next, remember to drink lots of fluids. I would keep a water bottle at my bedside so that I would drink throughout the night (along with a snack!), which I continued to do until I was confident that my supply was adequate. Throughout the day make sure to keep drinking large amounts, as it really helps your body as it manufactures milk for that little one! And don’t forget that your body needs lots of nourishing calories to feed a second person-remember that your baby is still depending upon you for all of his/her nutrition, and baby is now bigger (and growing rapidly!), so now is not the time to cut back or diet. You actually need an additional 500 calories than what you needed while pregnant!

Besides these three things, here are some other supplements that I have found really give my milk production a boost (and just a side note, these are NOT affiliate links, so I’m not benefiting in any way by suggesting these!):

Maxi-Milk by Mountain Meadow Herbs has been one of my favorite supplements over the years. I began taking it twice a day around day 3 postpartum this time, just to give my body a boost since baby was loosing weight and I wanted to get my milk supply off to a good start as it started coming in. This is the one supplement I have always kept on hand after each baby, and any time I feel my supply dropping, I start taking it, and can see a difference within 24 hours. It’s especially helpful during those days when baby has a growth spurt and wants to eat all the time, and you can feel your body struggling to keep up with baby’s demands!

Legendairy Prouducts offers several different supplements for helping build and maintain milk supply. I had heard about them in the past year, and had them recommended to me by other moms who had tried them. I knew I would be dealing with more stress and less sleep while traveling with such a young baby this time around, so I started adding the “Liquid Gold” supplements to my daily routine. I’m now trying the “Cash Cow”, and both seem to be helpful! I was especially intrigued by their formulas and the lack of fenugreek, as my babies tend to have very sensitive tummies, and have not always done well with the traditional high-fenugreek content of other supplements.

Moringa is a green super-food type supplement, that has been used for a variety of health reasons, but has a history of helping to encourage milk production. Check out the link to find out more about it! I take it each morning at breakfast.

Spirulina is similar to Moringa, and is recommended for boosting supply and the nutrition-density of mom’s milk. This is the first time I’ve tried taking it regularly for this purpose, but it’s one of those supplements that has so many benefits that it sure can’t hurt to add it to a new mom’s daily regimen! Once again, click on the link to find out more of it’s benefits.

When it comes to adding some nutrient-dense calories, AND keeping good, quick snacks on hand for a hungry (and busy!) nursing moms, these two recipes below are my favorites. They include such things as nutritional yeast, oatmeal (oatmeal is an old-time favorite to boost milk supply!), flax-meal, coconut oil, and other great ingredients to feed and nourish a new mom and baby. The first recipe is one that my mother-in-law perfected during the year I was trying desperately to increase my milk supply for my little guy who had so many nursing issues. They are super yummy while also having great ingredients. When I was exclusively pumping, I could see first-hand how these helped to keep my supply up! The second recipe is a variation of a granola bar that a friend brought to me after I had my third child-ever since then, I always make a big batch of these around the time baby is due, as it is a wonderful snack to have on hand for those first weeks of nursing round the clock (I keep one beside my bed for nighttime feedings during the first few weeks!).

Grandma Martin’s Lactation Cookies

1&1/2 sticks softened butter
4 TBSP coconut oil
1 & 1/2 cups organic sugar  (I use coconut sugar)
5 TBSP Brewers Yeast
3 TBSP ground flaxseed (golden tastes the best!)
2 eggs
2 tsp Vanilla
1/2 tsp EACH salt, baking powder and soda, cinnamon
1 TBSP ground Fennel seed
1tsp ground Fenugreek (I grind these 2 together in coffee grinder)
1 & 1/2 cups flour (for Gluten Free cookies use 1/2 cup each of brown rice flour & whole oat flour and 1/2 cup of another flour)
3 cups rolled oats
1 cup coconut
Chocolate chips or raisins as desired.

Roll into balls, place on ungreased baking sheet. Bake at 350 for about 10 minutes. Makes 3 dozen. These freeze well, and taste delicious frozen!

Energy Bars/Balls

1 cup warmed honey

1 cup natural peanut butter (or almond butter)

½ cup oat bran (or oatmeal ground really fine)

1/2 cup golden flax meal

1 cup unsweetened coconut

1/3 cup seeds (sunflower, chia, etc.)

1 c. chopped nuts (I like to use a blend of mixed nuts, though just almonds or pecans work as well)

1/2 tsp Celtic or Himalayan Pink salt

2 + cups old fashioned oats (enough to make mixture thick enough to form balls or press)

1 cup chocolate chips

Mix all together and form into balls or press into a pan to form bars, refrigerate until firm. I like to cut these into bars and wrap them individually for a quick on-the-go snack.

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In closing, I’d love to hear about what has helped you to maintain a good milk supply for your little one(s)! If you try any of these supplements or recipes, let me know what your results are. Blessings as you nourish your baby today!

Natural & Nutritious Formula Options: Resources & Info for Families Needing a Healthy Alternative to Breastmilk

Natural & Nutritious Formula Options: Resources & Info for Families Needing a Healthy Alternative to Breastmilk

Before I had children, I would have said that breastmilk is the absolute best choice for feeding a baby, and that a mom should try everything possible to breastfeed…and that if you tried hard enough, you would be able to succeed. However, once I entered the realm of motherhood, and actually experienced the things I had only previously read/observed/seen, I have learned that ideals are not always reality. My youngest baby just turned 10 months old, and I have once again faced the challenges of tongue-ties, latch issues, lack of sufficient supply, colic, fussiness, food sensitives, and more. Some of those subjects will be material for future posts, but I mention them to give you the background as to what inspired this post. As we have worked through these challenges, my husband has encouraged me that perhaps the things we learned will benefit others, so this is an attempt to do just that!

If you’ve struggled with nursing challenges, you totally understand the emotional roller coaster that is included. For some reason, the inability to feed and nurture your baby via the way in which you were designed to nourish him cuts deeply into our mother-hearts. As we tried one thing after another, I also felt like I was mourning a loss…I WANTED to nurse my baby, and I wanted to feed him the best, and know that I was nurturing him both emotionally and physically. I mean, breast milk is the best, right?!? And on top of those emotions (and who is not hormonal and emotional when you have a baby, aren’t sleeping, and are worried about your baby’s health?!?), there are all the questions about what to do, and if you’re going to supplement, what are you going to use??

This is where I want to help! While I know it can take a while before you can look at your situation objectively, there ARE other options available by which you can feed your baby and know that you are giving him something that is actually going to help him thrive and will meet his nutritional needs. I think that moms in the midst of feeding challenges have enough on their plates that they don’t need to add sorting through all the supplement information on top of it. My hope is that I can give you some pointers, and put some information at your fingertips in order to simplify your quest to figure out what is best for you and your baby.

As I spent time researching different options available, here are the three categories that I would recommend checking out:

  1. Weston Price Foundation Home-Made Formula: (find info here) This is what I used with my second child, who had similar nursing challenges and needed to supplement. At the time of his baby-hood, we lived in a rural area and had access to organic, raw milk from a dairy I trusted. He did really, really well on this formula, and I liked the fact that I knew exactly what was in it, and that it was REAL food. It took a bit to get the rhythm down and purchase all the ingredients, but once the pantry was stocked it didn’t take long to whip it up, and was actually a low-cost option long term. When he reached 6 months he used this formula exclusively until he was eating table foods, and was healthy and happy.  Once I used this, I figured my quest for a good supplement was over, but I didn’t count on the individual baby involved! My current baby could not tolerate it made with the milk I had available, and was also unable to tolerate it when made with goats milk. So the research continued as I tried to figure out how to help THIS baby and his own personal needs…
  2. Mt. Capra Goat Formula: (Info here) As I was continuing to research my options, I came across a number of recommendations for this formula. While it is not made using raw milk, you still assemble it yourself according to a specific recipe, thus allowing you to know exactly what it is in it, and still sticking close to the “real food” ideal. There is a kit available to simplify the process of acquiring all the ingredients, and the Mt. Capra website supplies high quality resources. After my baby didn’t tolerate the goat’s milk, I decided against the investment needed to try this, but it still looks like a really good, healthful option, and I’ve heard that there are many happy, thriving babies using this formula!
  3. European Formulas: I eventually stumbled across the realm of imported baby formulas from Europe. I’ll warn you, they aren’t cheap. And they are powered (that part still bugs me if I think about it long-what about feeding your children REAL food?!?). But they have been a literal answer to prayer for me and this baby. One of my big objections to using traditional formula is the fact that most of them are sweetened using corn syrup solids. Corn syrup!?!? We don’t even eat that ourselves, so why would I feed it to my little baby? And then there are the issues of soy, additives, and the list goes on. So I was amazed when I realized that there are several options of formula available that are made from organic milk, sweetened with lactose, have pre/probiotics, and are soy free. Instead of repeating information about these formulas myself, I’m going to include some links where you can see the brands available, along with their features and ingredients:

I will admit, too, that while powdered formula might not fit my ideal, it has been a helpful simplification to our life! My baby actually really liked the taste, and I happily observed that his diapers were hardly different in texture/smell than the usual breastmilk diapers. At 10 months (he started using formula exclusively at 7 months) he is a solid little guy that is SO much happier than he was before. There are several different suppliers in the US, and I have been happy purchasing from www.buyorganicformula.com.  Their customer service has been excellent, and my order always arrives promptly, and I’d highly recommend checking out their site. If you sign up for their mailing list, they will frequently send you coupon codes that can be quite helpful!

My happy fellow at 9 months!

My hope is that my experience and time spent searching can help to lift the load for another mom wading through her options! May you be encouraged today, and remember that you can still have a special bond with your baby AND know that you are meeting his/her nutritional needs even if you need do it in a different way than nursing.

I’d love to hear your thoughts-and what worked for you. Please feel free to comment with your own resources, experiences, stories and information-it’s great when we can help each other this way. Thanks for your contribution!

Fussy Babies, Tongue-Ties and Nursing Challenges

Fussy Babies, Tongue-Ties and Nursing Challenges

Matthias Johann 133Recently there have been alot of articles floating around on Facebook and other blogs regarding tongue ties and the challenges they pose for nursing babies. Reading these have reminded me of the very difficult six months following my last baby’s birth. In the past few months I’ve been wanting to write about this phase of my life, and I’m hoping that maybe it can be a help to others who might find themselves in similar shoes. While our family found some answers, I still have questions that I’m studying and researching…so this may end up being part one in a series! 🙂

For starters, a little background: my first pregnancy was challenging, especially for the first 20 weeks during which I was very sick. Towards the end, I ended up being border-line preeclamptic, and we were grateful that our little princess came safely, and a week early. Quite honestly, my labor and delivery the first time was “textbook” perfect: 8 hrs from start to finish, no complications, and with what we call in birth lingo an “uneventful postpartum”. While I never had an abundant supply of milk, nursing was fine, and she gained slowly but surely, being more of a petite little girl. She was on the fussy side (which, incidentally, runs in my husband’s family), and around 4 months I cut dairy out of my diet, which made a big difference in her personality. I still can’t say she was an “easy” baby, but she wasn’t excessively difficult, either. So, when little brother was on the way, I was happily surprised with how much better the pregnancy went the second time around. While I was queasy at times, and felt a bit picky about what I ate, I didn’t have the months of throwing up and severe nausea and weakness that I had the first time. The last couple of weeks I once again struggled with keeping my BP from going too high, but all in all everything went extremely well. Which, in turn, made me expect that nursing and baby care would go that much better the second time, as well. However, that was not to be the case…

When our little boy was born, he was an even 9 lbs, and nursed well right off the bat. Because he was doing so well with nursing those first two or three days, I made what I believe was my first mistake: I gave him a pacifier so I could sleep at night. I figured that he was nursing so well and so strongly, and since he was so chunky to begin with, and that it wouldn’t cause any problems…he was nursing constantly, and I just wanted a little bit of sleep! By week two, nursing started to become a battle. He would latch on for a second or two, then howl, arching his back, and fighting it. It wasn’t every time, but it increasingly got worse, so that by the time he was 3 weeks old I didn’t want to try to nurse him in public anywhere, as it took so much work. Like most babies, he lost weight the first week, but it took him an entire 3 weeks before he was back to his birth weight. At that point, we took his pacifier away, hoping that we were dealing with a case of nipple confusion, and that maybe after a few days we would be nursing fine. Those days were rough…he cried SO much, and wanted to suck constantly…and yet would fight me when I tried to nurse him. After a few days it got a bit better, but still not that great. By that time I wondered if maybe he was dealing with a sore tummy and food allergies, so I went off of dairy, hoping it would make a difference. After several days he seemed to be a little better, but not the drastic difference that his sister had made when I cut those foods out.

I still remember the day when he was about 6 weeks old. Joel was gone all day for a meeting (it was a Saturday, which normally was my day for a “break” in having daddy’s help with two little ones!), and I was expecting company for supper and for the night. My baby seriously cried ALL DAY LONG. I think he wore himself out enough to take two short naps, but that was it. Feeding was a battle, and I didn’t have a CLUE what to do with him. I laid him on the bed, and watched him cry, and all of a sudden it dawned on me that he could hardly move his tongue! He was howling, and his tongue literally looked as though it was tied to the bottom of his mouth. Now, being a midwife, I had seen tongue tied babies before, but all of those I had seen had been what they call “anterior ties”, meaning that you could see the membrane that tied the tongue. My baby had what I came to find out was a “posterior tie”…you could only see the membrane when you used your finger to lift his tongue up. After consulting with several midwife friends, I decided to take him to a doctor to have him checked out, and hopefully take care of the tie.

Monday morning I took him in to see the family practice doctor, which proved to be a disappointing visit. The doctor was very concerned about baby’s lack of growth, but totally shrugged off the tongue tie possibility, and instead wanted to do testing for a heart defect. I told her that I didn’t think a baby with a heart defect could scream as long as my baby could without wearing out, and declined the testing, telling her I would continue to monitor his heart and growth, and bring him back if there was any other concerns. I then returned home, called my dear nurse friend/fellow midwife down the road, and she agreed to come up and help me attempt to take care of the tongue tie. We did, and all of a sudden he could move his tongue unlike he had ever moved it before!

I was hoping this would be the end of the struggles, but it wasn’t the miraculous cure that I was hoping for. While he latched better, it still wasn’t where it needed to be. I could feel my milk supply dropping, despite eating quality and quantity foods (I gained 7 lbs. just trying to increase my supply!), and taking different herbs. A week later, my sister came to visit, which was a huge boost as I felt like all I was doing those days was trying to feed and console a crying baby. By the end of the week, after another long crying spell, my husband said “I really think you need to feed him a bottle of something and see if he needs more to eat.” Now, he had suggested this before, but I adamantly refused. I always taught that breastfeeding is the BEST way to go…once you start a bottle you’re on a downhill slope…etc, etc, etc. I had all the arguments as to why I would never feed my baby a bottle. But here he was crying, and we were desperate. So, I used some of the formula samples I had on hand, and decided to try it….and the little man ate as if he was starving. He drained the bottle dry in no time, and looked the most happy and content as he had ever looked. I cried. Here I was, thinking I was doing the best thing by pushing nursing, and my baby was starving. And talk about eating all the words you ever said…how could I EVER feed this baby a bottle in public?!?

But I wasn’t ready to give up on nursing…and the next several months held quite the times, as I continued to try to get him to nurse first, and get a bottle last. I tried a nipple shield-that really helped, but I felt like I had so much “equipment” along for nursing that it was no fun to go places. And after awhile I realized that not only dairy would cause his tummy to get upset, but so did wheat. So I kept to a very strict diet, which helped alot. But after dropping my milk supply so much, I never was able to get back enough to feed him 100% breastmilk. So that prompted another journey…researching formula alternatives. With all the additives, corn syurp solids and other things in powdered formula, I did not feel right giving it to my baby, and I was delighted to find the recipe for home-made formula on the Weston Price Foundation website (www.westonaprice.org). We were blessed to live just down the road from an organic, grass-fed dairy, and I began mixing up home-made formula on a daily basis. While it was more work, it was amazing the difference it made…no more constipation, and his stools and spit up were identical to a 100% breast fed baby. And he started gaining weight!

We continued the partial breast-fed, partial supplement feedings until he was about 6 months old, when one day he refused to nurse, and continued to refuse. I bemoaned the lack of bonding that would come from not nursing…and my husband wryly commented that he thought giving the baby a bottle peacefully was more bonding than forcing a screaming, back-arching baby to the breast. 🙂 Good point! Little Matthias continued to grow and develop normally, and once he could crawl around and eat solid food, he no longer had any food allergies. When he was 10 months old, I one day read an article about how lip ties can also affect nursing…and sure enough, he has a very pronounced lip tie. Which finally makes sense to me why he never was able to get a really good latch…his upper lip never was able to flare very well.

In retrospect, I feel like I’ve learned a number of things: first, I won’t quickly give another baby a pacifier. It really is best to let nursing get off to a really good start, even if you’re tire. Next, I wish I would have thought to investigate the tongue tie sooner. I am paying really close attention to the babies I deliver these days, to make sure it looks right! I also wish I would have searched longer and harder for a professional who could have maybe found both his tongue and lip tie and taken care of it right away. I think if it would have been done when he was 3 wks old, we would have had many less problems. I have also learned to never criticize another mom for the way she feeds her baby. Many times you have no idea what she has been through, and what may have brought her to the point that she is at. As mothers, we want to do what is best for our babies, and sometimes it looks different in other situations. I also STRONGLY recommend looking into making your own formula if you need to bottle feed! And lastly, I’m doing some research, and I haven’t figured it all out yet, but I’m really hoping that by possibly taking a different form of folic acid during my next pregnancy, I may be able to help reduce or prevent the significant food sensitivities/stomach issues and tongue ties in the next baby. I haven’t read enough to be able to share it yet…but I’m hopeful that maybe things can be different the next time around!

So, that’s the story…God’s grace was sufficient, though I really thought I was going crazy numerous times during those months. A fussy baby equals little sleep, and I went months without sleeping more than 2 or 3 hrs at a time. But our little fellow is worth it all, and brings us much joy…and I know I’ve learned an extra level of sympathy for those experiencing nursing difficulties and challenges with fussy babies!For more information on tongue ties, check out:http://www.cwgenna.com/ttidentify.htmlhttp://kiddsteeth.com/dental_topics.html#evaluate_and_diagnose_a_posterior_tongue_tie

Matthias around 1 week old

Matthias around 1 week old