Birth stories

“The First Birth”: A Story from 18 Years Ago
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“The First Birth”: A Story from 18 Years Ago

Not the baby featured in this story, but another baby born early on in my training!

From the time I was young (8 years old or so!), I had an interest in midwifery. I’m sure it stemmed from the fact that my mother used midwives for her pregnancies and the births of my five younger siblings, which gave me exposure to this “alternative” type of care. This was back in the day when having babies at home was NOT the popular, photographed and blogged about way to have your baby as it has become today! The midwives that cared for my mother seemed like an extension of our family, and as a young girl growing up, they were certainly some of my heroes that I wanted to become like when I “grew up”.

I think I was about 14 when I seriously felt like midwifery was something I wanted to pursue. Still very young and extremely inexperienced…with no idea what all this profession entails! I had read lots of missionary biographies, and a common experience in most of them included helping in some way (either unexpectedly or because they were prepared!) in childbirth in various countries.  So it seemed to my 14-yr-old mind that this was certainly a skill that would be good to know, and I pictured myself helping women in some far-off jungle or desert clinic someday. As I got older, I continued to feel a major pull towards midwifery that wouldn’t go away.

By the time I was 16, I was convinced this is what I needed to start pursuing. My parents wisely recommend that I begin by doing some reading, and they told me that they thought I should probably try to attend a few births before diving in head-first in a midwifery study program. Their reasoning was that perhaps this was just a passing whim, and why sink all sorts of time, energy and money into something only to find out that I would faint at the sight of blood, or have some other sort of aversion to what all comes with the birth territory. This is no joke. I personally know people who were SURE midwifery was what they wanted to do, but when they faced the nitty gritty, it didn’t take long to realize that it wasn’t their calling after all!

So, the next question was how on earth was I going to get any birth experience in, seeing as I was so young and inexperienced?!? I figured I would have to wait years for the opportunity, though I was reminded that if God wanted it to happen, He could figure out a way. That’s what makes my first birth experience so special-it was completely unexpected!

The summer that I was to turn 17 found me helping several families out on a weekly basis, going in to care for children, clean, cook, or do whatever was needed as a mother’s helper. One family was expecting their fourth child that summer, and they were excitedly planning their first homebirth in our state. Seeing as they had several young children, and that I had been spending a lot of time with them over a number of months, they asked if I would be on call to come and help babysit when the mom went into labor. This was the plan, with a backup plan being set where the children could go to a neighbor family’s home if the mom decided she could relax better without children in the house.

So one hot (Kansas is REALLY hot in July!) day, I got a call that the mom was in early labor, and that they would be glad if I could come care for the children so she could concentrate on resting and relaxing. I went over and made supper, took care of some household things, and entertained the children so mom and dad could focus together. An hour or so after supper, the mom decided that she would prefer the children leave the house, which left me thinking that I should probably go since my job was done. But the mom looked at me and said “I want the children to go, but you are to stay. I don’t want you going anywhere.” I sure wasn’t going to argue with that! She then went on to tell me that she wanted me to rub her back “just so” while her husband finished setting up the birth supplies and called the midwives, which I was more than happy to do. All of a sudden things kicked right in, and I vividly remember both parents bemoaning the fact that they hadn’t studied better on how to catch a baby if the midwife didn’t make it! I was blissfully ignorant, as I was only aware of my own mother’s very long labors, and figured we still had a very long night ahead of us. Little did I know!

I continued my “job” applying back counter-pressure as dad set up birth supplies, sweated nervously as he watched the signs of his wife progressing rapidly, read his childbirth class manual, and gave his wife emotional support. Thankfully, the midwives arrived just as mom started feeling more pressure, and all the last details were quickly set up and ready to go. About half an hour after the midwives arrived, a beautiful, howling, red little boy made his safe and smooth appearance, and I was in awe. I had no idea birth could be this beautiful, and I was so very, very grateful for the amazing opportunity. I was flying pretty high for days after this experience, and as you can imagine, I was totally convinced that this was what I wanted to do.

What is really hard to believe is that this baby will turn 18 this summer…I cannot believe that time has flown, and this many years have passed. After this first birth, I attended random births that I was invited to (word started getting around that I was interested, and some very sweet, very brave women invited me to share in their experiences, for which I will always be grateful!), and eventually began midwifery school when God opened the doors. It’s now been over 10 years since I graduated and started my own practice, and I continue to be thankful for those who initially helped me to start down this path by allowing me to be present at such personal, private life events.  As I continue to reflect back on memories and celebrate 10 years of practice, I want to especially thank each of you moms and midwives who took this very young girl under their wing and gave her experiences that will last a lifetime!

I’m so privileged to be involved in this work of ushering life into the world!

A Peek into a Local Home Birth!
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A Peek into a Local Home Birth!

I’m tickled to share these photos with you this month! While birth photography has gained in popularity in many of the large cities across the US, it’s not a very common thing in our area. So it’s pretty rare for one of my client families to hire a photographer to be present at their birth. Earlier this year, I was privileged to help Maria’s family for a second time as they welcomed their newest addition, and they graciously allowed me to post some of the photos from the birth here. One fun & unusual aspect of this birth is that my assistant for this birth and the photographer are both involved with the local doula agency that Maria administrates. Check out the Doulas of Central PA  if you are looking for local birth & postpartum doula support! And if you’re looking for a birth photographer, check out Denae at Vigilante Photography

The twinkle lights added a festive atmosphere, and I love seeing how moms relax when they get into the water.

 

Kristina has been helping as my birth assistant in between her doula babies, and you can see her here jotting down notes on the labor & delivery chart.

 

First good look at each other!

 

Older siblings watch excitedly, all excited to see baby brother!

 

He’s here!

 

Traditional sling scale to weigh baby…look at big sister’s face of concentration!

 

Newborn exam…always done within sight of mom and any interested family members!

 

Checking out feet reflexes and creases!

Foot prints for the records!

 

Born at Home!

Midwife gets a little chance to snuggle baby before handing him back to mama.

 

Great birth team-thanks, ladies!!

 

Midwifery and Mom Life: 10 Year Anniversary Interview ~ Part 2
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Midwifery and Mom Life: 10 Year Anniversary Interview ~ Part 2

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Interview: 10 Year Anniversary of Gentle Delivery ~ Part 2

Thanks again to each of you who contributed questions for this “virtual interview” as Gentle Delivery celebrates 10 years of practice! I’ve enjoyed this opportunity to connect with various readers, and I’ve loved hearing from so many of you. If you missed the first post, you can check it out here.  Here is installment two as I continue working my way through the questions entered:

How do you manage being a midwife and a mom?

Sometimes I’m not sure that I do! But seriously, it comes down to having a very supportive and involved husband. I could not do it without his help & support, and without him having a flexible job. He works from home, and generally speaking is able to set his own schedule. Without these key factors, I don’t think it would be possible. We both feel strongly that our children need to be our priority, especially while they are in their young, formative years, and Joel’s job situation allows us to almost always have one parent present. If I need to run off to a birth or client emergency, than Joel changes his schedule for the day and takes care of the children, which greatly simplifies my life! I honestly do not know how midwives serve year after year with a busy client load combined with stress of needing to figure out babysitting, especially at the last minute. A few months ago, I was called to cover for another midwife who had two moms in labor at once, and the second mom was moving fast. Without having the ability to just load up the car with my gear and run, I would have missed the birth! But since Joel was working from home (his office in our basement), I was able to be out the door in ten minutes, and he took over managing the children. His work-from-home arrangement also allows me to sleep in after a birth, and he will sweetly get children up, feed them breakfast, and care for things while I get some rest.

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Hot breakfast made by Joel and snuggles with the baby after being gone all night at a birth!

There are also some practical ways we have found that help to maintain balance, as well. As much as I am able to, I schedule appointments during my youngest children’s nap times, and I try to keep appointments confined to one day each week. This way I am limiting the amount of scheduled time I need to spend away from my children, especially since I never know how much unscheduled time I will be away at actual labors/births/emergencies. Another practicality is hiring cleaning help during especially busy months. My husband maintains that if I’m enjoying midwifery work and getting paid for it, then I might as well pay to get some of my other work done, instead of getting exhausted and stressed out! Oftentimes after a birth we will purchase supper (or take the family out) as a way to get some quality family time AND as a way to provide me with some extra time to do paperwork and miscellaneous business projects. I also get help with school, which is HUGE! My school-age children are part of a hybrid model co-op, where the parents help to teach classes, but they also have a classroom teacher who covers the “basics” and stays on top of the school details. If I was homeschooling full-time there would be NO WAY to do midwifery on top of it.

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Each of my children have attended births with me as babies…quite the adventures we’ve shared together!

Balancing midwifery and mom life includes another factor when I have a nursing infant myself. Whenever I interview with potential clients who would be due after I have a baby, I make it clear that if you hire me, you’re also getting my baby.  I always have an assistant or specific helper along who can care for my baby whenever I need to focus all energies on the laboring mom (and who needs a baby crying in the background when they are ready to push?!?), but otherwise I keep my tiny ones close so they can nurse and be with mama as much as possible. Some families are not okay with this arrangement, and that is their choice. I would much prefer they know what to expect ahead of time, and decide if they are comfortable with my boundaries, are there are always other options out there for them to consider!

One more key factor has been working with a midwife who is willing to trade call at times, which provides me with occasional time off to take trips and spend some focused time with my family. Without this arrangement, I would be tied to my phone and location almost 24/7 all year round! But this has allowed me to still spend some quality time making memories with my children, while knowing that clients are cared for, which is a tremendous blessing. While I still try my best to make it to my clients births, it’s also a relief to know that I can go “off call” occasionally for special events such as a school program.

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Twice I’ve caught babies just before delivering my own…one time a week before, and another time two days before!

 Is it realistic to consider being trained as a midwife, and starting your own practice as a midwife, with small children? What advice would you give?

This is a good question that deserves considerable thought. I had the opportunity to do my midwifery training when I was single, which was ideal. In my opinion, training to be a midwife was decidedly more of a time and energy commitment than practicing as a midwife. Here’s the reason why: when you are training, you need LOTS of experience. You need to be able to be completely available to your preceptor midwife, and willing to take advantage of every opportunity you can be part of. The only way to get the experience you need to be a good, safe midwife is by spending an incredible amount of time immersing yourself in pregnancy, birth, postpartum and women’s health. There are a number of midwives who did this training while they were balancing a family, but it is HARD, and you need to be prepared that it will take a long time. As a single young woman, I had the flexibility of time & energy which enabled me to finish my studies and obtain my required clinical experience in about two years. But this included spending 18 months at a birth center where we literally immersed ourselves in the world of birth by living, speaking, and breathing everything birth related. Seriously! I don’t remember a day passing that didn’t include a significant discussion about something to do with an ongoing client situation, lab values, birth stories, complications, etc.  This type of immersion would have been impossible had I been trying to spend time with family, and it certainly sped up the training process.

Now that I am an independent midwife, I can make my own decisions about how many clients to take on in a month, what risks I am comfortable with, what my parameters of practice will be (for instance, when I do prenatal appointments, or what seasons I may not be available for first time moms), and when I want to take personal time off to give my family some breathing space. In most apprenticeships, a supervising midwife counts on a student midwife to be available whenever needed, and the student cannot set these types of parameters and still get the training she needs along with keeping a good preceptor/student relationship. So these factors all need to be considered, and I think there needs to be some serious conversation with your husband and family about whether your family is at a good place to make the sacrifices that training would require. I don’t think one will ever regret spending quality time with her children while they are young, but you might regret not spending that time later on!

I would encourage any young mom interested in midwifery to read as much as you can, as learning more about your body and about the birth process is going to be beneficial no matter what. There are excellent books out there that can lay a great foundation of knowledge about how the pregnancy and birth process works. Watch videos & documentaries, read birth stories, connect with other moms and learn about their birth experiences. Look for opportunities to get involved on a small scale. Perhaps you’d be able to provide doula services for a friend, which would give you and your family the opportunity to experience what it is like to live an “on call” lifestyle (ready for mom to leave at any time day or night!), seeing how it works to have mom leave and how to figure out babysitting fast. This would give you a chance to see what this aspect of being involved in birth can be like. I don’t think any birth experience is wasted time, especially if you’re hoping to be a midwife, so slowly looking for opportunities and taking advantage of them as doors open can help as you consider further commitment. Always remember that if God wants to be a midwife, He will make a way for you…but in His timing, and in a way that it will be a blessing to your family. Be patient, pursue the small opportunities as they arise, and see how He directs as time goes on…one older midwife told me once that “women will always be having babies, but you won’t always have young children, so make sure you don’t regret not enjoying them while you have them.” Excellent advice!

I’d also recommend that any aspiring midwife read A Midwife in Amish Country, as Kim does an excellent job of detailing her experience training to become a midwife as a homeschooling mom of young children, relating her experiences and lessons along the way.

How many births do you take on, and why that many?

This really ties in with the whole mom/midwife balance topic, as this is another way we try to walk this line. As a general rule, I cap a month with two due clients. Occasionally I will take on a third, if my family is at a stage where this is more possible, and if I have a slower month before or after. As a mom approaches her due date, her prenatal visits need to take place more frequently, resulting in more mamas needing to be seen each week. Then you factor in a home visit (an additional afternoon besides my usual appointment day), the birth (for anywhere from 3-30 hours), birth paperwork, another visit to their home for a postpartum check, and the frequent contact via phone/text/email that takes place over this time, doing this more than twice a month in additional to caring for other moms is about what I can do and still enjoy my work. Here again, if I didn’t have young children, and all the unexpected things that factor into life as you care for little people, it would be much easier to add more clients due in a month. But I want to enjoy both my own children and the opportunity to do births, and this number seems to be working well for this stage in life!IMG_0031

Thanks for taking the time to read this second installment in this interview series! If you’d like to contribute a question for a future post, feel free to add it in the comments below. As always, thanks for sharing, and feel free to check out Part One if you haven’t read it yet. See you next month!

Interview: 10 Year Anniversary of Gentle Delivery, Part 1
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Interview: 10 Year Anniversary of Gentle Delivery, Part 1

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The year 2019 marks ten years since I started my practice as a midwife, after having spent several years studying, training and preparing to serve families in this way. I still remember the excitement of catching my first baby as a graduate midwife in January of 2009, after having moved home from TX (where I completed my academic training & clinical experiences here in Dec. 2008), and I cannot believe how quickly ten years have passed! Since that birth, I have been privileged to catch babies and care for moms & families in four different states, I’ve moved crossed country, married, and have had four babies of my own. All of this has certainly helped to mold, shape and broaden my experiences and skills, and I am so very grateful to each of the families I have been privileged to work with.

In honor of reaching 10 years, I thought it would be fun to see what questions some of you might have, and I was delighted by the questions that were thrown out on the Gentle Delivery Facebook Page. Here is Part One of a series in which I’ll start answering these questions…and I would love to hear yours, so if you haven’t left a question yet, feel free to do so below in the comments!

  • How and why did you get started in the field?

The “how” is the fault of my mother, who pursued homebirth after two negative hospital experiences, back when birthing at home was not such a popular idea. After her first birth at home with midwives, she went on to use them for care with the rest of my siblings (there are 7 of us!), and I grew up with the idea that having babies at home is a normal experience, and much preferred over the standard hospital setting! The midwives became close family friends, and were certainly heroes one would aspire to be like, in the eyes of a 7 to 14 year old girl growing up watching these women serve, care for and love on our family.

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My 11# 8 oz cousin!

The “why” part is two-fold: one, I had a dream of serving God on the mission field somewhere, and thought that having a skill to offer would be an amazing way to connect with and become friends with women, while hoping to make a difference in an area where women were at high risk during pregnancy & birth. I was interested in pursuing midwifery with this dream/idea in mind, and several friends and relatives knew of this interest. My dear aunt then invited me to be present at the birth of her son, and I still treasure the memories of the time I spent with her and my uncle while we waited on my cousin to make his appearance. This not-so-little cousin of mine still tops the record as the largest baby I’ve ever witnessed being born, and it required a great amount of skill on the part of the attending midwife to not only deliver him, but also to help him breathe and recover from his rocky transition. While this was not your typical smooth, low-complication normal birth, I learned a tremendous lesson through this experience: a skilled midwife can make a difference between life & death, and that this is a serious responsibility to consider. After this birth, the thought that kept playing in my head was that I never wanted to be in a situation surrounding birth and wish I had learned what to do to help. It also helped to solidify that this was something I wanted to pursue, but it also gave me the reality check I needed as I began.

In light of the fact that my original dream was to work with women in another country without access to good maternity care, I do find it a bit humorous how God has taken me down a completely different path as I serve women in a very prosperous, beautiful little university town in Central Pennsylvania!

  • What changed in your approach / practice as a midwife from before you had children to after you experienced birth first-hand?

This is a good question! I find that I have a totally different perspective on the intensity of labor…there were times I seriously wondered if I could actually do it when I was in labor myself, and experiencing that has certainly helped me to understand what moms are going through. I also don’t look down on anyone for getting an epidural after experiencing labor myself! Before I had children, it was like “why would you do that?!? Don’t you know the side effects??” but once I was in labor I totally understood why that option would be considered! I’ve also found myself trying to be more sensitive to each mom’s individual preferences, spoken or unspoken, as I found out in my own labor that just because someone thinks they are helping, it’s not always the case. I think it’s helped to soften my opinions, too, as I’ve realized on a different level how many things are actually outside of our control. For instance, while not specifically about birth, I always thought that any mom could nurse if she tried hard enough. Well, I learned the hard way that trying hard isn’t always enough, and nursing has been a complete battle for me, which has taught me that each mom must figure out what actually is right for her and her baby, and that might look different than what you anticipated. So maybe the simplest answer to this question is that it’s helped me to grow in empathy!

  • What is one “bucket list” experience you haven’t had yet but hope to in your midwife career (e.g. delivering triplets, delivering a breech birth, an en cual birth, etc.)?
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Newborn exam on a baby that I caught during my first year of practice.

To be honest, I don’t mind the un-eventful and un-exciting ones these days!  All midwives know that at some point they will attend a breech birth (usually a surprise baby that turns between that last appointment and birth, or when the head is mistaken for a butt), and I experienced my first surprise breech two years ago (I was called to cover for another midwife, so it was a REAL surprise!), so that one is off the “bucket list” with plenty of  gray hairs to prove it. I’ve missed several babies that didn’t want to wait for me to arrive (even if I was driving fast…my brother used to say he thought it would be fun to drive for midwives, so he’d have an excuse to drive FAST!), and I had the special privilege of catching twins & assisting with several sets. Two things I would love to witness yet would be an en-caul birth (I still haven’t had a baby born before the membranes have ruptured…though I’ve had plenty that ruptured JUST before birth, providing me with a shower of fluid!), and I’d like to top my current highest repeat client number of three babies for the same mama. One downside to moving across country (and then moving across several counties a few years later!) is that you don’t get to continue care with the mamas you might have started with. Up until recently, two had been the record I had been able to deliver for the same family, and I finally caught my third baby for the same family in 2018. If we can stay put long enough (and I can convince my clients to keep having babies-ha!), maybe that record will be higher eventually…though I’m guessing that not of all my clients want to help accommodate my wishes on that one!

So, after reading these, what are your questions?? Feel free to let me know, and stay tuned for Part Two of this 10 Year Anniversary Interview. Thanks for sharing & adding your comments!

The Birth Story of Baby Darius
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The Birth Story of Baby Darius

It’s hard to know where to start with Darius’ birth story, as there were several starts-and-stops along the way during the last week or so of my pregnancy. Joel will shake his head and say something along the lines of “shouldn’t a midwife know when she is in labor?”, but once again I had trouble figuring it out.

To give some background (especially if you’ve read my previous birth stories), we had used our dear friend Rose as our midwife with our girls, and she ended up being the first one on the scene after Matthias was born (she was home on a school break THAT weekend, and our midwife was on her way from Lancaster, but Matthias came in a hurry-read his birth story here). We love her, but due to a variety of reasons (especially the fact that Joel has no desire to ever catch one of his own babies again) we decided that this time we needed to use a midwife who lives closer to us. In the past two years I have been blessed to meet and work with Rose Marie Spicher, a midwife who lives half an hour away, and who worked for years in TX (where I did my midwifery training). She provided the “mothering” care I needed throughout my pregnancy, and it gave Joel a sense of relief to know she wasn’t too far away. With me being on maternity leave the month of May, and the fact that everyone else was expecting in May as well (I have NEVER received so many inquiries for one particular month!), I was just hoping that she wouldn’t be tied up whenever our baby decided to come!

So fast-forward through all the months of sickness, fatigue, finding out that we were expecting a baby brother (the children are still certain this was a direct result of their prayers, as I was convinced it had to be a girl given how sick I was!), and everything else until the beginning of May. By early May I was reaching that totally-done-being-pregnant stage where I wasn’t sleeping at night, having lots of cramps  & contractions, felt extremely emotional all the time, and we were wondering just when this little fellow would decide to make his appearance. Between 34-36 weeks I was experiencing enough cramps and contractions to know I needed to take it easy, and once we hit 36 weeks I had a couple of times where I thought perhaps we were getting started-I distinctly remember one night when I couldn’t sleep because of contractions, so Joel & I slipped outside to take a walk in the moonlight. It would have been so romantic if I hadn’t been so uncomfortable! But everything always fizzled away, and left me feeling tired and discouraged.

At this point we were preparing for a visit from my parents, who live in Kansas. My sister had her first baby the month before, and my mom wanted to come out to help her over the time my brother-in-law was graduating and they were preparing to move. So she flew into northern PA, spent a few days with my sister, and was then joined by my dad. The plan was that they would drive down to see us before they headed back to Kansas, and of course we hoped that baby would arrive before they left, though we knew it was entirely possible that he would wait until they were home again. However, with all the early labor signs I had been experiencing, I’ll admit that I was getting my hopes up! Mom & Dad planned to arrive on Mother’s Day, and the night before I was trying to encourage things along, and ended up with a night of contractions with no baby to show for it. Everything was regular enough that I actually called my midwife to give her a heads up, but then it all petered out.

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Mother’s Day 2017

I really had to work through the disappointment of knowing that perhaps my folks wouldn’t get to meet their grandson on this trip. We didn’t know when we would be seeing them next, and I hadn’t realized just how much I had my heart set on them getting to be here to see MY baby while he was new and tiny. It took some talking, praying, crying and processing with Joel to get to the point of being okay with the fact that perhaps this time with mom & dad was to be spent enjoying their company and not stressing over whether baby was here or not. So for the next few days, my parents helped to take my mind off of waiting for baby, and we enjoyed some lovely family time at the park, taking walks, picnics, a backyard barbeque, and some time for Joel & I to be together while our children were cared for.

The last night of their visit, they took our two oldest children back to stay the night with them in their cabin. In the interest of full disclosure, I had taken some castor oil in the afternoon, knowing full well that there was a good possibility nothing would come of it, and yet hoping that perhaps it would give my body the nudge it seemed to be waiting for. I was NOT going to get my hopes up, though, and I tried to just go to bed to get some sleep. I think it was around midnight or 1am when I woke up with a contraction, and yet I tried to sleep, as it sure wasn’t the first time that random contractions had woken me up at night! After an hour or so of not really sleeping, I figured I might as well get up to see if moving around made them go away or get stronger.

Joel sweetly got up with me, and fixed me sourdough toast with strawberry jam-his mom had given me jam and sourdough bread the week before, and it was becoming a regular midnight tradition to eat a piece when I couldn’t sleep! After another hour or so, Joel commented that these contractions seemed to be pretty regular and close together. I did NOT want to give another false alarm to anyone, and didn’t feel sure that this was anything more than what had happened on previous nights. Looking back, they were coming close together (every 2-4 minutes!), but they weren’t very intense, and they didn’t last long, so I wasn’t convinced they were doing anything. With my previous babies, my water had always broken either before labor began or at the start of active labor, so I kept waiting for that to be the clue that this was the “real thing”.

At 4:00am, Joel really felt like we should call Rose Marie, as he said he thought this seemed more serious, and he did NOT want to wait until it was too late! So I  called Rose Marie, and I told her I still wasn’t sure this was “it”, yet Joel would feel better if she came, but she didn’t need to rush. The contractions were starting to get a bit more of an “edge” to them that took my breath away, but I still felt like I could make myself talk through them, though I preferred not to. Another sign I should have paid attention to!

Within 15 min of calling Rose Marie, all of a sudden things kicked in with a vengeance. Up till now I had still been puttering around, but hadn’t gotten birth stuff out yet, as I had gotten it all out and then had to put it all away a few nights before. I wanted to make sure I was in REAL labor before getting everything set up again, and figured I could do it in between contractions as a distraction. Well, that’s not how things happened. Labor went from being “not sure this is it” to “we’re in seriously active labor” in a few minutes! Joel called Rose Marie back and told her to step on it, and then he promptly called Lynelle (my birth assistant who was planning to assist Rose Marie with our birth-she lives less than five minutes away) and told her to come. I think it was around 4:30am when Joel called Lynelle, and boy did she know how to get over to our place in a hurry! Joel said he has never in his life been so happy to see Lynelle walk into a room, and it was just in time.

By this point my contractions were one on top of another, and I felt like I didn’t have any time to collect myself, catch my breath or get a break in between. Joel kept encouraging me to breathe through them (he didn’t want me pushing!), and I was leaning over the birth ball squeezing his hands for all I was worth, just praying that God would make it stop so I could catch my breath. Lynelle quickly realized things were serious, and started pulling all the birth supplies together. All of a sudden I told them there was no way I could keep from pushing any longer. It had been taking everything I had to blow through contractions, and I was done. I distinctly remember saying “you all are just going to have to catch this baby ‘cause I can’t keep him in any longer!” Lynelle calmly replied that everything was okay, and with the next contraction my water broke. Now I can laugh about it-that was the clue I had been waiting for all along to tell me if I was actually in labor! With the next contraction Lynelle could see his head, and she did an awesome job of coaching me through as I tried to breathe him out. Right at the point his head was delivering, Rose Marie walked in the room! Lynelle started to move out of the way, but Rose Marie just smiled and said it looked like she was doing a great job, so she might as well continue. Rose Marie guided Lynelle through the rest of her “first catch”, and the official birth time was 4:56am.

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Those first moments after birth…

I can still remember the absolute relief that comes from being finished, and laying down with my baby on my chest. He cried just enough for us to know he was great, and then he snuggled on my chest, and we all exclaimed over his head full of strawberry blonde hair-that was a surprise! We had a really special next hour or so as we reflected over the crazy labor, the special-ness of the unplanned “first catch” for Lynelle, Rose Marie’s perfect timing, and Joel’s relief that he didn’t have to do this birth alone. We had invited another family friend to be present at the birth, and sadly she didn’t make it time, but her sweet & joyous spirit added to the atmosphere in the room as Joel fixed breakfast and baby Darius had his first meal. Thanks for coming, Mary!

And then it was SO amazing to call my parents and tell them that their grandson had arrived! Having them able to bring our oldest two over first thing that morning was so special. They were able to watch the newborn exam, meet our midwives, and see the children as they delighted in meeting their new sibling. It was the “icing on the cake” to have them around, and able to snuggle their newest grandbaby that morning, before they had to leave that afternoon to catch their flight home.

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Yoanna & Matthias and Grandma & Grandpa meeting baby Darius. Yoanna was delighted to help Lynelle give him his first bath!

We had struggled with finding the right name for our little guy, and settled on Darius Rafael just a few weeks before his birth. Darius means “Upholder of Good” and Rafael means “God is Healer”.  It is our prayer that our little son will grow into a man who does good, and is used to provide God’s healing to others. He checked out at 8# 10 oz, and measured 20 in long. Matthias was absolutely delighted to have a baby brother, and they continue to have a special relationship as brothers.

Here’s a few more snapshots of Darius’ “birth” day…enjoy this glimpse into our little family’s life, and feel free to check out the birth stories of our girls, Talitha & Yoanna.

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Big sister Talitha was pretty excited to wake up and find that baby brother had “come out!”

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Rose Marie checking baby out

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Our amazing birth team-thanks so much for everything!!

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Topics for 2018 & a Give Away!

Since my fourth child arrived in  May, I’ve been pretty quiet on this site! But now that baby has reached 6 months, and life is settling into more of routine, I’m thinking about the new year. Here’s where I need your help: I would LOVE to hear your ideas of what you would like to see covered in future blog posts! I’d like to realize my goal of one post a month throughout 2018, but I could use some input as I try to sketch out a plan for the next year. I often try to post about topics that are relevant & beneficial to my clients, and for families who are considering midwifery care and/or healthful, natural living. So send me your ideas, and topics you would like to hear more about!

And here is your incentive: each person who submits an idea (either in the comments below, or on our Facebook post with this same title) will be entered into a drawing to receive a copy of one of my favorite pregnancy/birth related books that was published this year. The Mama Natural Week-by-Week Gide to Pregnancy & Childbirth is a wonderful addition to your pregnancy and birth library. Think of it as a “natural version” of the old “What to Expect” favorite. “Mama Natural” covers everything from nutritional needs, what is happening to baby & mom each week of pregnancy, how to prepare for natural birth, pros and cons of multiple caregivers and birth locations, and so many of the questions that moms wonder about during pregnancy. I think you’ll love it, and if you don’t need it yourself, you just might have a friend that would enjoy it!

So here’s the details: submissions can be entered until midnight on Sunday, December 10, and a winner will be announced on Monday, December 11 (unless a baby changes my schedule-I’m a real life midwife, so there’s always the possibility that I may have to announce the winner later!). Entries can be made below in the reply/comments section, or you can enter by leaving a comment below the facebook post with this headline. I’m looking forward to finding out what you all want to discuss, learn and/or find out more resources about in the next year. Thanks for helping me out!

Feel free to share this with friends, so they can enter too!

Is Homebirth the Right Option for Me?
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Is Homebirth the Right Option for Me?

As a midwife providing home birth services, I hear this question frequently. It is my goal to provide families with the information they need in order to make the right decision for them-home birth is not for everyone, just like hospital birth is not for everyone! Ultimately, the choice of where to give birth and which care provider to use is the responsibility of the parents seeking such services, and it’s my desire to assist you by providing accurate information that can assist you in making this decision.

Since this question is one of the foundations of whether or not to pursue working with a midwife and planning towards a home birth, I thought it might be helpful to provide links and resources that may help you in determining the answer to this question. As always, I am happy to sit down and talk with anyone who wants to ask specific questions and discuss their options in person, but I know that many of you would like to gather some more detailed information before a formal meeting. Thanks to the availability of information via the internet, great books, educational videos and more, there are many resources that you can access to learn about the potential risks and potential benefits of midwifery care, and specifically the home birth option.

FILMS & DOCUMENTARIES:

  • Why Not Home? The Surprising Birth Choices of Doctors and Nurses: This is THE current film on home birth and why some families make this choice…and this film in now available to watch online and/or be purchased for home viewing! From the description on the website: Why would doctors who attend birth in hospitals choose to have their own babies at home? What do they know about birth that others don’t? Join Jessicca Moore, filmmaker and nurse practitioner, on a compelling journey through maternity care in the United States. Told through the lens of doctors, nurses, and midwives, Why Not Home? examines the latest evidence on risks and rewards of different birth settings. The film presents a balanced and accessible view on the latest research, along with moving personal stories of medical practitioners faced with big decisions for their own growing families. Viewers are challenged to move beyond preconceived ideas, and to envision a fresh future for maternity care in America. Watch it here.
  • The Business of Being Born: This film has been out for a number of years now, but it still contains some great information on birth choices, interventions, birth locations and more. You can watch it free on youtube here.
  • Natural Born Babies: short video of several moms and dads describing what influenced them to make the choice to deliver at home. Watch here

ARTICLES:

BOOKS:

  • Your Best Birth: Know All Your Options, Discover the Natural Choices, and Take Back the Birth Experience by Rikki Lake & Abby Epstien.  An easy-to-read overview of options available to moms, this book covers all the possibilities (hospital, home, OB/GYN, midwifery care, etc.) and why different options may work best for different situations and individuals.
  • Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin. Ina May began her career as a midwife back in the hippie movement of the 1970’s. Since then she has delivered thousands of babies, and has done extensive research in the field of natural birth, and she shares her wisdom in this book. She highlights the need to make a choice of birth location in which the mom feels totally comfortable, be that home, birth center or hospital. Great information about routine procedures, tests, and how to have a healthy pregnancy and wonderful birth experience.
  • Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth and Modern Maternity Care by Jennifer Block. While not a very positive or light-reading style book, this one can really help you understand how medicalized maternity care has become in our country, and enables you to think through some of the routine policies and procedures that are in place in our countries hospitals. Very eye-opening and thought-provoking.

WHAT MIGHT IT LOOK LIKE?

And finally, some couples wonder about what a home birth might look like. What about “the mess”? How can it work at home, if we’ve only experienced the hospital setting? How do midwives adapt to different settings, positions and environments? How does the medical side of midwifery care happen in a home setting? These videos, pictures and personal stories can give you a glimpse of what home birth with a midwife looks like for some families:

I’d love to hear from you-what helped you to determine whether home, birth center or hospital was the right location for your birth? What resources would you recommend to help other families make their decisions? Feel free to comment below, or send me an email with your suggestions. I love hearing from my readers!

The Peaceful Birth of Talitha ~ Part 2
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The Peaceful Birth of Talitha ~ Part 2

Here is the promised second part to Talitha’s birth story. If you want the background leading up to where this story begins, click here.

By this point in the afternoon, the noise from downstairs was almost constant, as Chris was doing his best to finish the basement project up by evening.  Lucy had called telling us that their ETA was around 8pm, and just ecstatic to hear there was a good possibility that she might get to be around to see her nieces’ birth (we had told her before that we would love for her to be there, but also told her not to get her hopes up, as there were still two weeks until the due date. I think she prayed pretty hard!). I think it was around 5 or 6 that I went ahead and took a dose of castor oil, hoping that it might help things move along in order to have a baby by morning. We were just getting ready to sit down for supper around 6:30, when Rose arrived at the door-she thought she’d just come hang out, and check in on us! During supper, she noted that I was having to breathe through contractions pretty consistently, to which I replied that “I can still talk through these so I’m trying not to notice them”. She just smiled.  Chris ended up clearing out of the basement around 8pm (Joel finally told him he’d better just clear out-he hardly had time to finish the project after waiting so long to start in the morning!), giving us about 20 min. to sweep, dust, and start getting the bed ready, when Daniel & Lucy arrived at 8:15. Lucy assured me that she could make the bed.  By now I was starting to notice the contractions, so I took Rose to see where baby things were, and we talked more about where we were planning to do the birth, etc. We opted to “camp out” on the main floor, as Daniel was going to be banished to the basement, and we were hoping the toddlers would sleep through the birth in their own beds upstairs. One huge blessing of home birth is the ability to be flexible with the birth location! (oh, and we became more flexible as the evening wore on…)

At 9pm, I felt that release of pressure and felt the trickle that made me think my water had broken…and sure enough, the next contraction confirmed that! Now THIS felt like the “real deal”, and I knew I didn’t have much time before needing a place relax free from distraction. I told Joel that it might be a good idea for the children to go to bed (they were still super excited about the arrival of their aunt and uncle), and he caught the drift, and hustled them off to bed. Daniel disappeared, and it didn’t take real long for our living room/fireplace room to be transformed into a birthing room! Joel had borrowed a large air mattress which he set up in front of the wood stove, and Rose & Lucy got all the supplies out and in good order. I found it most comfortable to sit on the ball, as it helped to be able to move and relax at the same time.

I had always dreamed about having lovely music playing while I labored, and during my pregnancy had been very blessed by the “Sleep Sound in Jesus” CD by Micheal Card. Joel so sweetly made sure to put it on, and I can still remember how special it was to meditate on some of those lovely songs between and during contractions. The mood of the room was so peaceful, with the lamps turned low, Rose & Lucy quietly chatting in the corner, Joel holding my hand (and not minding my squeezing him…during labor I DO NOT want to be touched, but I sure need his hand to squeeze!), and these sweet songs filling the air. The one in particular that stood out to both of us was “Even the Darkness is Light To Him”…the lyrics that kept repeating in my mind were “so you are safe as the light grows dim, even the darkness is light to Him…The Father above does not slumber or sleep, He wakefully watches our ways, then there’s no reason for you to weep…would not Jesus safely keep…?” Even though it was intense, it was also amazing to me to feel so at peace and at rest, after so many events, activities, responsibilities, etc. that had taken place those last weeks and months.

Time seems to stand still during labor, or at least you lose all ability to gauge time. I think I spent about 45 min. or so laboring on the ball, and feeling grateful that this time I had a chance between contractions to completely relax and prepare for the next one (so unlike my previous birth!), even though they were coming about every 2-3 minutes.  Joel would encourage me, Lucy would ask questions about labor and birth, we’d all chat for a little bit, and then another one would hit. Although I have such peaceful memories, I’m also struck with the fact that I vividly remember thinking “this is the hardest work I have ever done in my LIFE…how on earth can women forget how hard it is to have a baby?!” So there is one perspective on the roller coaster of emotions in labor! Another thing, that when I’m not in labor I can laugh about, but the one piece of instruction that stands out the most to me from all my years of working with other midwives and childbirth educators, the thing I remember is “if your lips are loose then your cervix is too”. I can’t remember who said it, but it sure is practical! For some reason, that is a point I can focus on, trying to keep my face muscles loose, and thinking about how it means everything else is loose and open, too.

Sometime between 10:15-10:30, I all of a sudden wanted to go to the bathroom. Once again, you’d think I’d know, but when Rose asked if I thought it was time to push, I told her that surely things weren’t that far yet, and that I was positive this was just a result of the castor oil. She looked skeptical, but being the sweet midwife that she is, she just said to go ahead. As I moved to the bathroom, Joel left to get something in the kitchen. Once I sat down, I felt one massive contraction coming on, and immediately needed his hand. After several extremely intense back-to-back contractions, there was that massive feeling of pressure, and instant change in tone. At this point, Joel strongly encouraged me to move off the toilet…and I’ll admit that inside I was thinking that that was a totally crazy suggestion…lots of babies are born on the toilet…and how on earth can I move now?!?  However, Rose had quietly brought in the birth stool, and when I saw it next to me it looked possible to move, which we did as soon as the next contraction was over. I can honestly say that I don’t find pushing enjoyable…it’s like the last sprint in a long race, and I wonder if I’m going to be able to do it…but within 2-3 contractions, our little Talitha entered this world at 10:46pm. Only 1 hr. and 46 min. after my water broke and active labor started-and the castor oil wasn’t even necessary!  She seemed a bit stunned, and took a bit to pink up and really cry…I kept rubbing her over and pinching her toes and telling her to breathe…Rose commented that I sure couldn’t quit being a midwife, could I? Once she gave a good long cry I held her close, and was amazed-she was no little baby, and she had a lovely head of dark hair!

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Less than an hour old here, I think!

The remainder of postpartum went well…I moved from the bathroom (seems like births have a habit of happening in the tight, small quarters of the house!) and snuggled into the temporary bed set up in front of the cozy woodstove (that night was one of the coldest we had that winter!), then Rose did the newborn exam. Even with all my determination to grow a smaller baby (her brother had been 9#), and all my attempts to eat a strict diet and exercise regularly, this baby girl weighed 8#15oz, and that at a good 2 weeks early! And no, my dates weren’t off! Big

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Yoanna meeting her sister

sister Yoanna got to come down and kiss the baby, and her eyes full of awe were so sweet as she gazed on her little sister. After some food, and an absolutely lovely shower, I was packed off to my own bed upstairs. The ladies had the house looking normal again, Rose headed home (by now the snow had stopped, and the snow plows had gone through), and we enjoyed the pampering of Aunt Lucy for the next 4 days. Having her around to entertain the toddlers, cook meals, clean the house, and take care of all the little details was a tremendous blessing, and another gift from God.

Talitha Shalom means “Little Girl of Peace”, and it’s our prayer that she will embody this name as she grows, and that her life can be filled with God’s peace…just like the night of her birth was!

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The children meeting baby the next morning

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Three little ones to nurture!

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Capturing her expressions

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Dear Aunt Lucy and Uncle Daniel!

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Less than 24 hours old!

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Mama has her hands full!

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Talitha with baby E-the one I caught just two days before my birth…this was their first time at church!

The Peaceful Birth of Talitha ~ Part 1
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The Peaceful Birth of Talitha ~ Part 1

Note to my readers: I kept thinking I’d get this story written long before now, but I finally finished it just before my baby turns one. How time flies! My apologies on the length…there were so many details that had to be shared to give the background, but if you aren’t interested in those, just wait for the actual “birth story” coming soon!

When I sit down to write out the story of Talitha’s birth, the subject that continually comes to mind is that God answered prayer. Seriously. The winter of 2015 was unlike any I have ever experienced to this date, full of stretching in areas physically, spiritually, and emotionally. In order to understand part of the picture of how so many things came together in order to make her birth the peaceful event that it was, bear with me as I give you some background to that cold February night…

My husband, Joel, has served with All-Nations Bible Translation for many years, and earlier in 2014 the decision had been made to build a training base in the State College area, just 2 miles or so from our home. It would take too long to recount the ways God opened doors for a location, permits, funds, etc, but suffice it to say that, as generally happens with construction projects, this one had taken much longer than expected before all the red tape was completed in order to begin building. Which translates into the “crunch” time beginning while I began my last trimester of pregnancy, even though it hadn’t initially been planned that way. While I was not helping with construction J, it was our responsibility to make sure the volunteers had coffee, snacks for break, lunch, and sometimes even a place to stay along with breakfast and supper. Joel had tried to get help in for this, but to make a long story short, nothing worked out-though he was able to get a number of churches and interested individuals to help with some of the food prep, in order to reduce my load. I will admit that these months were HARD. When I’m pregnant, I’m extra emotional, uncomfortable, unsocial, and ready to be DONE. To add hostessing, food prep, and all the effort that goes into that to having two toddlers to care for, all the while dealing with pregnancy issues stretched me beyond what I thought I was physically able to handle. Oh, and I should mention that our small church community (made up of about 7 families) had THREE pregnant mamas, two major moves, a house renovation project AND health issues during the last two months of my pregnancy. But God gave strength, and we pressed on, reminding ourselves that at least the construction project wasn’t something that was going to be repeated!

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How the building project looked in January…so much snow that volunteers had to be taken up the lane in a 4 wheel drive vehicle!

Besides the building project, I also was committed to delivering babies! The “last” baby I had on my radar before my own was due the end of January. When I took on this sweet couple, it was with the idea that January would be my “rest month”, as Joel was actively lining up help for the month in order for me to prepare for our baby. I also figured that since there were a solid 5 ½ weeks between this mamas due date and my own, this also should be no problem. Well…sometimes God has other plans in mind! I started getting a bit nervous about how all of this was going to work out when I began having preterm labor signs of my own around 33 weeks. When I realized that I was beginning to dilate, and that baby was settling lower and lower, we seriously reduced my time on my feet, which helped to slow the contractions. I began praying that God would help baby wait at least until this other baby came…and that baby wouldn’t come before we could do it at home. We figured out a workable plan in which I would sit with my feet up after every hour or two of work, which helped to keep things at bay, though I started wondering if we’d be meeting our baby sooner rather than later. But back to babies…the one due in January was not to be my “last” one after all! One of the ladies in our church, who is a good friend, had some things come up which made their family feel like perhaps the midwife they had chosen was not a good fit for them. While I do not normally get involved with a situation such as this (there’s often a deeper reason when a couple and midwife part ways late in pregnancy, and it’s not something to delve into without concern), we had a close relationship with this family, and felt like we needed to help them out. Incidentally, this mama was due the same week as I was, and we had been neck-to-neck throughout our pregnancies, though she was convinced she’d deliver first, as her babies tended to come early. We lined up a back-up, just in case, as there was the real possibility we’d both be in labor at the same time…

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Getting things ready for baby sister to arrive!

So all of that brings us to the first week of February. At this point, I’m still having contractions whenever I ‘m on my feet for awhile, and I’m waiting on two babies before my own can come. It’s the kind of situation where you keep saying, “Okay, Lord, let’s see how you’re going to work all this out…” 🙂 In the middle of all this, we started a renovation project in our basement…we had help to do it, and wanted to have the basement ready by the time my mom came to help after our birth, and I didn’t want to be dealing with dirt, dust and noise with a newborn, so we dug in. There were times I cried-like when the heater came on in the basement and spewed concrete dust all through the house…but the guys made great progress throughout that week, and one afternoon a sister from church came over to help me clean. After waiting about 10 days from his due date, the “January baby” came…and I felt like it was a direct answer to prayer to have a clear night for travel (no snow and ice on the road) and a straight-forward, relatively short labor, complete with a healthy baby. I felt a huge sense of relief, too, as that was one more responsibility off my shoulders, allowing me to feel more prepared for my own baby.

By the time the third week of February began, my friend and I were wondering who was going go first. I had reached that point where one is chronically uncomfortable, but so had my friend. That Sunday night she went into labor (just 3 days after moving into her newly renovated  house…talk about cutting it close!), and early Monday morning I was called over, helping them to welcome a baby girl within an hour or two of my arrival. Once again, God was gracious, giving them a lovely birth, with no issues that would have been challenging for this very-pregnant midwife to take care of! This week were also trying to finish up the renovation in our basement, as Joel’s sister, Lucy, and her husband were supposed to be arriving that week in order for Daniel to do some trim work at the ABT project. So I napped around construction noise, and felt grateful that meals at the ABT project were being taken care of by another church family who had moved into our community just the week before (remember my mention of two moves over this time?!).

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Baby E around 24 hrs old…this was the day before my own baby came!

Another aspect of uncertainty surrounding this birth also had to do with the availability of my own midwife. Our dear friend, Rose, had been involved with our previous two births, and we really wanted her for my midwife again this time. For each birth, God answered specific prayer related to her availability, and this time was no exception! She was working down in Lancaster, and while she had permission from her employer to head our direction when needed, my last labor hadn’t given us a lot of warning-and Joel was not in a hurry to do a solo birth again! I had also been hoping to have my student, Emily, involved, even thinking that at least she’d get some good practice if Rose couldn’t make it in time. But she was already committing to attending her next midwifery class in Maine, which was scheduled to take place the last two weeks of February. So we prayed, and committed the situation to the Lord, knowing that He would work it all out somehow…but not knowing exactly who would be a part of our birth team.

Tuesday night, the 17th/18th, I slept fitfully, being awake for several hours with contractions. While intense enough to keep me from sleeping, they wouldn’t get any stronger, and I kept wondering at what point I should be calling Rose to come. When morning finally arrived, I was tired and discouraged. By this time I had experienced many uncomfortable nights with little sleep and lots of contractions, and wasn’t sure how much longer I could survive physically and mentally. After so many hours of consistent, time able contractions through the night, finding myself at only 4cm was so disappointing…surely things should be happening by now! Joel was so understanding, and after giving me time for a good cry on his shoulder, he sent me for a long, relaxing bath, after which he put me back to bed to see if I could sleep. He then proceeded to tell our friend who was working in the basement to wait to come for several hours. I know this seems like an unrelated detail, but it played into the events of the rest of the day!  I was able to sleep in the quiet house, and once I woke up refreshed, Joel told Chris to come back-we found out that Daniel & Lucy were coming that evening, instead of waiting for the next day-so we needed the basement for them to sleep in!

I still look back on that Wednesday as a gift. Up to that day, my life had been so full, the schedule so tight, so many urgent, pressing things to take care, running from here to there. No time for reflection, or for that mental preparation that is so helpful when facing something like labor. Even after having had two natural births, I found myself fighting fears of a different type this time. Nightmares of having to be taken to the hospital, because I couldn’t take the pain. Wondering if I could mentally cope with whatever might come in labor. Every time I would voice those fears, my husband would remind me that they weren’t coming for the Lord, and that I needed to trust in Him, and resist those fears. Yet having a day in which to reflect, and be able to gear up mentally for labor was something I needed in order to be prepared. Joel encouraged me to take the day “off”, and he even suggested taking our little family out for lunch. It’s one of those sweet memories I have…our last outing as a little family of 4, enjoying some relaxed time together at the local Chinese buffet. Talking about when the baby might come, and the children soaking up the time with mommy and daddy.

Contractions continued to come and go throughout the day, and Joel (wisely) wondered if it might not be a good idea to touch base with Rose. He really didn’t want her to be very far away if things did start to happen! Rose informed me that she was off work the rest of the week, and was thinking of heading up to her family’s place in order to do some study, and be closer to us in case baby decided to come. I went for a walk in order to get some fresh air and sunshine (though a storm was brewing), and found contractions very strong and intense while walking, though they would slow down again whenever I would sit. Around this time, Joel and I discussed whether or not I should consider taking castor oil. While we didn’t want to interfere with God’s timing of this birth, we also knew that I was physically very run down, and we were concerned about how I would handle more DSC_0632csleepless nights should things continue. After talking with Rose again, and finding out that she was studying at a nearby restaurant, as she felt from the tone of my voice earlier that she should be close by (and a snow storm was predicted for later on in the evening!), we decided to try castor oil if things didn’t move forward on their own. The mind-body connection is amazing, as contractions began to pick up again after just knowing that Rose was 2 miles away!

To be continued….

Some Recommended Reading
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Some Recommended Reading

As we’ve headed into a new year, I’ve been taking the time to update old records/files/paperwork, etc. One of the fun things I’ve updated is my current library list. While the internet can be an excellent resource for many topics, I still enjoy a good book that can stay on my nightstand, or be read while I nurse baby (one of the best things about having a nursing baby is getting guilt-free time to sit and read a book!). This past year I was introduced to a number of books that I had not read before, and I thought it’d be fun to share a few of those titles to you, in case you’re looking for something new to read!

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One of the library shelves in my office

  • Ina May’s Guide to Breastfeeding by Ina May Gaskin: I found this jewel at a thrift store this summer, and picked it up just because of Ina May’s name. It’s a great resource to have on hand if you’re wanting some extra help or information on breastfeeding issues. One thing I appreciated was that she actually dove into the issue of tongue-ties causing nursing difficulties, which is something that many manuals on breastfeeding overlook. Overall, this book was a great easy-to-read book that I would recommend adding to your home library!

 

  • Pushed: The Painful Truth about Modern Maternity Care by Jennifer Block: This book is not your “feel-good-warm-and-fuzzy” type, but if you’re in to making informed choice, and understanding the politics and protocols that go on behind the scenes, especially here in the US, this is an eye-opener. Jennifer explores the history behind different changes to the maternity care scene, how insurance companies dictate much of hospital’s protocols, how our lack of understanding our bodies and understanding the normal function of birth contributes to the rise of interventions, the limitations in so many areas of good alternative care options, and more. While it can be a bit depressing at times, it was definitely educational, and helpful in understanding risks vs. benefits of different medical choices.

 

  • The Official Lamaze Guide: Giving Birth with Confidence by Judith Lothian: While this one has been around for awhile, I had never taken the time to pick it up and read through it. I found that it really wasn’t all about a particular “method” for birth, but more about understanding how your body works, and how to work with it. Clear, concise information written in an easy-to-read style, with birth stories to boot.

 

  • Cut, Stapled, and Mended: When One Woman Reclaimed Her Body and Gave Birth on Her Own Terms After Cesarean By Rosanna Rosewood: This one deserves a disclaimer-while the story was fascinating, I don’t recommend or agree with everything this mama pursued in her quest for a VBAC. However, this book helped me to understand many of the challenges that brave VBAC mothers must make as they recover, heal, and prepare for birth from an emotional, spiritual and physical standpoint. I found it valuable as I seek to help mothers who desire a VBAC without having personal experience.

 

Besides the mentioned books, I’ve encountered a few new resources that I would heartily recommend:

  • Spinning Babies DVD’s: The Parent Workshop & Daily Essentials. Gail Tully, the instructor of these DVD’s and the brains behind the Spinning Babies website, has so many tips, suggestions and information to offer-and it all helps to make pregnancy more comfortable, understand your body, and encourage baby to be in good postion…which ultimately helps your labor, birth and recovery to go so much smoother! If you haven’t spent time on Gail’s website, it’s worth looking in to!

 

  • VBAC:Know the Facts by Jen Kamel: Jen has compiled an immense volume of research and facts surround VBACs, and presents them in a fascinating seminar that can be taken online or attended live. This 6+ hour seminar addresses subjects such as myths, actual research results, how and why different hopsitals have different protocols, what complications can increase risks (and how to avoid some of them!), and the list goes on and on. If you are considering a VBAC and have questions, or just want to learn more about the subject, this would be a very worthwhile investment. I learned so much from it!

 

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More books…and they don’t all fit here, either!

This past year I had a friend who contacted me-she was newly pregnant, lived in another state, and wanted to know where to start in figuring out what she wanted for her pregnancy, birth, caregiver, etc. What a list of questions! And where do you start?!? So I’ve been on a quest to find factual, evidence-based information to help new moms in making decisions and sorting through all the myriads of opinions and information. If you have a resource that was particularly helpful to you, I’d love to hear about it! Feel free to comment (below), leave a message on the facebook page, or send me an email at: gentlemidwife@gmail.com. I’d love to hear from you!

And if you want to check out my updated Recommended Reading/Library List, feel free to look at it here:  https://gentlemidwife.wordpress.com/recommended-reading/  Remember, clients have access to this library as part of their maternity care package!